Top 5 Activities which help my Bipolar Husband – and me.

  1. Exercising with a 5 year old

Now, i’d rather stick pins in my eyes and eat my own vomit rather than go for a run. I’m more of a team player – Netball if you want to know, and no more so than when it comes to my family. So we (I) decided that we should get active and involve our daughter too.

Good role models and all that.

So some of our best Sunday mornings have been going for a jog (despite hating it, i love my husband THAT much that i’m prepared to do it) and taking kiddo out on the scooter with us.

A bit like having a dog. but with more attitude and usually wearing a lot of pink.

We always have a destination in mind. Usually Starbucks or Costa for an early morning brew and gingerbread man. We’ve had a handful of occasions where it’s not quite worked out, but on whole it’s been a thumbs up from all 3 of us.

  1. Cleaning and Laundry

Ever since i’ve known my husband, he’s been a keen cleaner. We’ve often had rows over my ‘cleaning’ of the bathroom and who knew that salt had to be put into the dishwasher quite so often?

Not me.

Anyway, his love (even though he strongly denies this word) of cleaning, has often been his way of escaping life. Focus on the mundane and his self worth of his productivity reaps rewards. Times when he’s been signed off from work, i’ve purposefully not loaded the washing machine and he takes care of it and dare i say, seems to enjoy it.

I’m a lucky lady you say?

Well, just remember who gets up with him in the middle of the night and wipes his weepy eyes and regulates his breathing in a panic attack. I do my fare share of duties. I know not all men like this, but it could be washing the car (he likes that too).

  1. Cooking Chicken Carcass Soup

I do make my husband sound ever so domesticated. And he his. Despite looking like a burly 6’4” Rugby player, he’s actually a very sensitive caring soul deep down and traditional ‘female chores’ he’s cool with.

So he cooks.

One of his favourite things (which totally grosses me out and i do not see the point of) is boiling a chicken carcass (you see, i told you it was gross) and making a soup out of it.

A tasty soup.

But it’s a lot of faff, and i’m more of the here’s a tin, now where’s the opener kind of girl. But for us, when he has the time to lose himself in a stew or casserole he enjoys it.

  1. Having 40 winks (and some)

He needs his sleep. Good quality, the house is quiet as a mouse, kind of sleep.

But we have a 5 year old, who likes talking, asking questions, shouting. And all before 6.30am.

I do the early shift, even if i’ve had a bad night, i always do it. I get up in the night if she’s upset or ill. It’s me. I suck this one up. If i don’t we all have a shitty day. But on good days, i negotiate time off later in the day or he does the bedtime story.

Getting up is so difficult for him and lack of sleep is a major trigger. So we have to factor sleep into our lives.

 

  1. One-on-one time with our daughter

We once saw a Doc about the behaviour of our daughter. She’s full on, and her birth was my husband’s trigger to all this Bipolar-ness we experience every day. Anyway, the doc gave us some good advice…

Spend 10 minutes every day with your daughter, playing and 100% focus on her. Take her lead, repeat the things she says so she knows you understand.

Well, strike me down with a feather (as my Grandma would say), it turns the house into a tranquil sanctuary with all three of us benefitting some way or another. And a really lovely bonding thing to do as well. We should all make time to do this with our children

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2 thoughts on “Top 5 Activities which help my Bipolar Husband – and me.

  1. I appreciate how you got specific in this post. You mentioned that getting up is so difficult for your husband, that jumped out at me. That’s one of my major battles right now. I’m unable to easily transition between sleep/wake & wake/sleep. It’s like once my body’s in one mode, it wants to stay there for all eternity. I’m just curious as to how he overcomes the daily morning hurdle of simply getting out of bed?

    Thanks so much for opening up & sharing so much of yourself here. -Krista

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    1. Hi Krista, thanks for your message – I love getting messages it means people are actually reading my blog! The mornings are not great, but have been getting better in the last few weeks. He’s motivated to get back to work, so that’s been helping, but I also bought him a Lumie light alarm clock which gradually gets brighter in the morning to aid waking and gets darker at night to aid sleeping. My hub scored it a 10/10 for his xmas gifts – see our little review here There are some other sleep aids on that page too, mornings are the worst though and short of a freezing cold shower, we’re still not quite there yet! Wishing you all the best – let’s keep in touch. M x

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